I spoke to Uncle Ha Ha, he had me in tears.. He called to wish me Happy Mother’s Day… We talked about Uncle Ike… I think deep down inside my heart he is hurting coz he wasnt by his side when Uncle Ike took his last breath.. I got off the phone with him and went thru my old post where I talked about Uncle… I cant bring myself to cry… Maybe its me refusing.. but I’ve accepted his passing.  I couldnt bring myself to ask Ha Ha if he felt bad for not staying.. but the pain in his voice spoke in volumes.  Life Goes On…

 

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL!!!

 

later PodPhreakz,

Sin.

MAY 4th

Well, I’ve spent the day isolated from the entire world.. No phone, No internet. This day sucked! Not only do I feel isolated I dont have any running water… **Caution** DONT USE BATHROOM!!! This day suckz ass man! On top of this I’ve had only one cig… in the AM hours… My friend was suppose to come over but she didnt.. I think I’m going crazy at this point. *sighs* I had one bottle of water that made due with washing off… but my hair is a different story… OH NASTY HAIR.. I’ve slept a day away again… well about two hours it was really to hot to sleep.. I did however get my living room clean… and hid my dirty dishes in the oven coz I got tired looking at them… No water cant wash um… I am waiting for my neighbors to return so I can borrow their phone. They invited me to church… I had my front door open and they blew their horn and ummm yeah they invited me. *grinz* but I must admit they are extremely nice folk…

I have missed Jenny all weekend… I wanted to be online to welcome her home but coz I have shit service and cant use either the phone or the online… yeah… dat sux ass I cant greet her.. and I really want to… I would say, “Welcome Home Beautiful, I’ve Missed You Greatly!” yeah of course I’d tell her I love her coz I really do! To me, Jenny is like that breathe of air You enjoy, the beauty that You cant stop staring at.. and her voice… is hyponotic…Her laughter sings a song of joy when I hear it reach my ears.

The neighbors are back.. I am gonna wait about 15 mins (probably type that long) and let them settle before I crash their daily routine… I so gotta use the phone if not I wont be working tomorrow.. I had when my things dont work.. I suppose I should be more greatful when it does.

Lil D is going to Atlanta, Georgia for his 8th grade trip. I am happy that he gets to go.. BUT the mommy in me is absolutely terrifed. I do want him to go to see for himself that is okay to get out and travel coz Ya always can go home.. ((where-ever You truly feel loved))… I mean I want him to experience a different culture.. I want him to see all the things… at the same time.. He is going alone.. I have to let go.. but he is my baby… He has to grow up… yet that inter-voice yells and screams at me he is my baby… I know a baby that has grown up to a teenager that soon will become a fine young man… I just hope he keeps his heart of gold… I want him to be safe… He is all I have.. and sometimes I must admit I do wonder… I love him and I hope more than anything (even gettin dsl and phone back) that he has a safe trip and comes home!

Ugh… I so need to go use the phone next door.. but but but I dont wanna! I have to… I hate talking to other people that I dont know.. on the phone is fine face to face.. yeah believe it or not.. I’m actually shy… online is easy to be me.. I dont have to look at anyone in the face… but once I get to know someone.. eh nine times out of ten they wish they hadnt… I think anyway… But dont tell Jenny I said I think!!!!!!!!! She mite beat my butt… ohhh I do wish to meet her face to face… and by crackie one day I will… I am hoping that if I get vacation time before winter that I can seriously go see her… if she will have me… Do You think she will have me? Hmmm, perhaps I should ask first huh? Yeah yeah, we talked about it… I think about what will be my first words.. Hi Jenny, or hello… or just a big wet sloppie kiss… my luck it will be I’m hungry or I gotta pee… no wait it will be so what we gonna do? How about I ask her a ton of questions… my luck tho she will have a ballgag waiting on me to shut me before I start!!!!!!!!!

 

Brb… Gonna crash… well they aint got a phone service either BUTTT… they do have cable… YESSSS… ummm I just hope Tonya gets my message for her to come get me… But I did find out EVERYONE is down whooptie doo… GRRR… I MISS JENNY… Oh I crashed on them but didnt wanna seem rude so I just sent Tonya an email..and was done with it..I talk to much… omfg I really talke way to fuckin much… *SMACKS HEAD* bad sin bad sin shut up you big mouth dork… welll that is how I feel right now to my neighbors.. for the most part I stay to myself… and keep quiet.. Oh lawd it is like 11 minutes til nine pm and I am already thinking about bed…

JENNY I MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY!!!!!!!!!

I would say I miss Dragon but he likes to ignore me… well okay I do miss Dragon too… I waited on Dragon til three am Saturday/Sunday… never did see him *sighs* I give up…

Someone say a prayer, light a candle, cross Your fingers and shoot a load of cum… I am trying for the position… my friend seems to think I would qualify… so I’m gonna do it… all they can do is say no.. which I know this is done by who has the skills… and I hope that I have good enough skills… and if I dont… then I work harder at it and try again… right?

Well, if I cant get online tomorrow.. I’ll do another **journal** and post when I can…

And Jenny… just so You know, I’m thinking about You and I love You a bunchie lot.. Dragon.. Your in there too!!

Later PodPhreakz,

Sin.

Today, I woke up happy.. specially sine I got up at 4:20 am and out the door on my way to work by 5:30 am.. Oh feelin good at work.. jokin around for an hour before start time.. Enjoyin the warm weather… **awww** so nice… Time to get on the phone… FIRST CALL…  She is screaming in my ear like a damn banshee…I WANT A SUPERVISOR… I wanna kill myself over this ((mind You she said that several times during the call)  well being the “good” associate that I TRY to be… I asked if I could help her.. She starts…I dont know what to do.. I cant figure out what’s happened to all my money… You have fix it… then she again asks for a supervisor…  So, I connect her to a supervisor… 20 calls into my day… I get a report from my Team Manager… Good Ol’ Warren… I was on call so he just hands me the paper… I read it and I bite back my tongue… OH MAN I WAS PISSED!!!! The “supervisor” had the nerve to tell him I could have resolved the issue myself!  Well I wrote on the paper that I told the “STUPIDvisor” that the customer called in wanting a supervisor and I tried to DE-ESCALATE the call… but on the second request.. I done as she asked…  Well Good Ol’ Warren.. wrote the “STUPIDvisor” back and said I was in the cube next to her when she took the call… ((which his desk is next to mine)) The customer was screaming uncontrollable and the agent was unable to assist with several attempts to work with the customer. The agent then got a supervisor when the customer asked a second time. 

The day drags on slowly.. I’m at my wits end.. I got cused and yelled at today more than talked to… I wonder whatever happened to people with manners?

Laterz,

Sin.

Tremors Felt Around The State

An earthquake rocked the region early Friday morning.

There are no reports of significant damage or injuries after a moderate 5.2 earthquake rocked southern Illinois. The quake was centered near the town of New Salem, near Evansville, Indiana. However it could be felt all the way here in the Bluegrass and even as far south as Memphis.

It was sudden awakening for many across the region as the quake shook homes at 5:37 this morning.

State disaster and emergency officials are receiving scattered reports of small damage across western Kentucky and in Louisville.

According to Buddy Rogers with Kentucky Emergency Management, bricks came down from the facade of an older building in Downtown Louisville and a house in Logan County had three rooms where drywall cracked. Rogers also says bridges in Western Kentucky have been looked at and all are okay.

WHAS radio reported a water main break in Louisville may also be tremor related.

At this time, we do know that a 5.2 magnitude earthquake centered in Illinois hit at 04:36:57 AM Central, according to the United States Geological Survey Website.

27 NEWSFIRST is gathering more information. We will continue to update you on the air, as well as on 27 NEWSFIRST.com.

AP STORY

Ky. residents jolted by Ill. quake

LOUISVILLE, Ky. (AP) - An earthquake shook people awake across wide portions of Kentucky early Friday, prompting calls to authorities but causing little damage and no reported injuries.

The 5.2-magnitude temblor struck just before 4:37 a.m. (CST) and was centered six miles from West Salem, Ill., and 66 miles from Evansville, Ind. It was felt across a number of states.

Beverly Lee said her area “shook like crazy” in the Reed community in Henderson County but the quake caused no damage to her mobile home.

“It was just like someone was standing outside shaking that trailer,” she said by phone from western Kentucky. “It shook my daughter right out of bed.”

Chuck Wolfe, a state Transportation Cabinet spokesman, said the agency had dispatched inspectors to check out bridges, especially in areas closest to the quake’s epicenter, out of an “abundance of caution.” He said he had received no reports of damage to roads or bridges.

Wes Royse, a sales representative at WCLU radio station in Glasgow in south-central Kentucky, said the quake lasted as long as 30 seconds and shook him awake.

“It started out with a real fine shake, and then it got a little bit harder,” he said.

In Louisville, the quake caused a bricks to fall off part of a building near downtown, and television video showed bricks strewn in the street and workers using equipment to remove them.

Chad Carlton, a spokesman for Mayor Jerry Abramson, said there were no reports of injuries.

Bill Stephens, news director at WSON-AM in Henderson, said he heard a rumbling when the quake struck, but said he had seen no damage to his home. He said his station received numerous calls from startled residents.

“There’s a lot of fright with this one because of how strong it was and the time of day,” he said.

Authorities across Kentucky also were inundated with calls.

Kentucky State Police dispatcher Natalie Alsip at the post in Henderson, just across the Ohio River from Evansville, said telephone calls poured in to the post and one man reported cracked plaster at his home.

Dispatcher Katrina Ellington at the state police post in Mayfield said there were many phone calls from western Kentucky locations, but no indication of injury or serious damage.

In far western Kentucky, no damage occurred at a uranium enrichment plant and operations continued as normal, said Elizabeth Stuckle, a spokeswoman for the Paducah Gaseous Diffusion Plant.

(Copyright 2008 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

So what do You think of my new hair cut?

I’m sorry… its not even good enough anymore… I realize I hurt You.. but I’m sorry.. I dont know what to do to wipe the hurt from Your face.. I dont know what to do… I’m lost.. I promised to never do it again.  Is it too late? *cries*

 

 

 

Me:

When I was in school children teasing never bothered me as bad as the teachers did… it was hell… in high school I lost my hero.. the man I looked up to for my everything… Daddy was gone.  I got pregnant when I was 16 the principal said if You had to do it over nodding toward my tummy would it be different.. I said no. I lost my baby sister when she was only 13. My sisters think I’m the dumbest person walking the face of this earth.. Mom played favorites when I was growing up.. I was forgotten.  When I was eight I was molestated by a old man…I had an uncle who tried to moleste me..  I was raped by a cousin… I was beat by a x husband.. the other x husband his words hurt more than any hand… I lost a friend, one nite he tells me he didnt want to live… the next nite he was gone… drugs and a car wreck.. I live by haunted memories and pain…  I cant change nor would I change my past.. I do not want pity I do not want nothing… It made me who I am today… ITS JUST LIFE!  ((like I once was told… just various chapters in my book of life, everyone has their own story))

I just wanna take a shower tonight… I just wanna wash away all my dirt… I wanna scrub my body clean… and yet I’m simply to tired!

I was so upset yesterday… I wanted to come home BUT I didnt… I applied for OJT Coach… and here is the letter that I got:

Dear Phuckin Sinful Phreak,

Thank you for your interest in the temporary OJT coaching position.  We received pre-screening data from may associates.  Unfortunately, based on the pre-screening data which you submitted, you were not selected for an interview at this time

We want to thank you for your interest and encourage you to submit your information again in the future if you are meeting performance and attendance standards.

Sincerely your,

Rotten Cunt Birdie

Managenment

BLAH PHUCKIN BLAH

So that was the joy I got on top of that the first 15 calls were irrate callers.. also I got into trouble for stating I’d like to smear doggie poo on Rotten Cunt Birdies car door.  I’ve made a decision that I am gonna be more than just a person to answer the phones… but for now I’m the person who answer the phone with Thank You For Calling…. anyway, it will take time and I am gonna do it!

Later PodPhreakz,

Sin.

I have known You for a long time and I love You still.

In this place deep in my heart no one else could ever fill,

The joy and happiness that You do so bring to me,

You open Your heart and let me be me.

You took the time and open my eyes,

With ever step I took and a zillion tries.

With laughter, happiness and lots of tears,

Your words helped me through from my fears.

You opened up and truly let me in.

From then on, I was Your only Sin.

In this place deep inside my heart no one else could fill,

Throught it all with love You have helped  heal,

Through out time and a journey yet to come here I am still.

Written By:  Sin.